Happy 1st Birthday Alexa!!!

To say that this year flew by would be an understatement. It's so crazy how in the blink of an eye your baby is no longer a baby anymore..I think it's hitting me harder this time because I know that this is probably my last baby...

I'm really trying to keep it together I am...

When we decided to have another baby I suddenly become so nervous about so many things. Being that Nathan was already 4 years old I was so worried about having a new baby around. Not only for him, because he was so used to being an only (SPOILED) child but I worried how I as a mommy would be able to share my love with another little person. I know this sounds crazy but then again I worry about everything so to me it makes perfect sense. I worried about all the small things, like how I was going to balance out being there 100% for both kids, and if I would remember how to take care of a baby after it had been so long, I worried that Nathan would feel betrayed and wouldn't accept his little sister, I worried about worrying...well because that is what I do.

When I was pregnant I would stay up late at night, letting my imagination run wild, imagining how different my life was about to be..Not in a bad way, but I knew my life was going to change in every single way.

Once I saw the eyes of my baby girl all of my worries went away. I instantly fell in love and felt so grateful to be the mommy of such a beautiful little girl. 

When I look into the eyes of both of my children I realize that I am far from perfect and have made a lot of crazy decisions in my life..but I know that in my life I have done two things absolutely perfectly and those are my children Nathan & Alexa!!

This year has been quite a whirlwind and I was right.. my life has definitely changed, but no matter how crazy it may get I could not imagine it any other way.


To my daughter Alexa Maria~

I vow until the day I leave this earth to be the best mommy that I can possible be. I promise to never let you wonder about how much I love you. I promise to guide and support you in all of your decisions even if i do not agree, and when you fall flat on your face I promise to be right there to pick you up. I promise to kiss your owies and nurse you when your sick. I promise to give you everything that I possibly can and to push you to be the best you can possibly be. I promise to teach you about love, life, and disappointment and everything else in between. I promise to be honest with you so that you always know where you stand. I promise that no matter what nothing or no one will EVER come in between us. I promise to hold your hand and guide you and provide you a shoulder when you need someone to cry on. I promise to love you forever more...

Happy 1st Birthday Baby Girl.............I hope you know that I love you so.........

xoxoxo
Mommy